[ userinfo | inside my head ]
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Friday the 13th Again [13 Feb 2009|11:42am]
[ mood | melancholy ]

I have no idea what I was pissed off about last time I posted. But today is a sad  Fri. the 13th. I broke up w/ my gf of 3 years a week or so ago. And of course, tomorrow is Valentine's day. =( How sad. 

Also, a very close friend of mine, lost one of her Best Friends a few days ago. Not 2 weeks after being diagnosed with leukemia, she was at the doctor for testing, and she had an allergic reaction to the dye and died. She was so brave, she wasn't even worried about Chemo, more so about which major to take, and stress of having to prepare for her life while dealing with such a powerful disadvantage. She is in our hearts and thoughts.

I was also reminded of another terrible incident which for various reasons I will not describe in detail here, in which a 16 yr old girl who happened to actually be a part of my extended family, was taken from us in a horrible way.

This has been a rough few weeks, and I am grateful I was able to notice the signs before things became worse, for as soon as I was informed of the tragedy I mentioned first, it brought up the emotion of the second tragedy, and forced me to confront another close friend, as I feared for the safety of him and another of my kin. I saw the signs coming, and continually reminded them firmly about the risks they were taking and the NEED for it to stop immediately. Had I not been so direct, he may have been paying less attention the other night and I don't know if I could go through that again.

Details have been (unfortunately?) intentionally left out of this post for various reasons. Comments/ emails/ messages will (hopefully) be responded too.

It's been a [few] very rough year(s).

Take solace for the many things we still have. I have been personally affected and influenced (as we all are) by the many things (fortunate and otherwise) that have touched our lives. I hope you all are well.

Be happy today, for tomorrow is never guaranteed.

--Robert (aka Cy )

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[13 Jul 2007|06:17pm]
[ mood | pissed off ]

friday the 13th. fuck this shit

7/7/7 [07 Jul 2007|11:11pm]
[ mood | amused ]

today is 7/7/7 and i feel luckier =]

YAWn, awesome     

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la la la la [06 Jul 2007|09:36pm]
[ mood | elated ]

I feel much less depressed today ^^ mostly because I'm getting an insane new job. Say hello to a new PHP Developer at Robert Half technologies =D

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[05 Jul 2007|08:54pm]
[ mood | depressed ]



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4th of july [05 Jul 2007|01:25am]
[ mood | content ]

Happy belated 4th everyone!

My night was pretty cool. I ended up going down the street to watch some fireworks and drink a few forties with this bum i ran into haha.

not much else to say, so к всем доброй ночи, до завтра

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lj customization [02 Jul 2007|03:12am]
i can't seem to figure out how to change the Stab / Cuts thing. i wentto the overrides page and changed it but it still isn't working. if youknow something i don't please help me out ;)
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Welcome back Livejournal. [02 Jul 2007|02:40am]
[ mood | accomplished ]

although i probably won't use this almost ever, i at least might use it rarely.

i've come a long way from 122 weeks ago (according to livejournal, my last post, who knows)

ok so i'm robert, 20 and i live on my own in costa mesa.

yawn its late so i'll keep it brief.

доброй ночи всем

oh ya, edc was awesome ^-^

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blah. [05 Oct 2004|09:08pm]
[ mood | god fucking knows ]

i HATE the way of the world. it sucks. nothing can ever be perfect. even if you think you've found perfection, something will come fuck it up. forever. and crush you. and people dont care.

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[28 Sep 2004|04:58pm]
[ mood | god only knows ]

my life has been a tilt o whirl the last few days. i have no idea whats going on with me. several days ago i was so depressed every thing i looked at or thought about was terrible. i just wished for it to all end. a few days ago, was the best day of my life. quite the opposite of the bad day. every thing was awesome. today im upset at everything. i really dont know what to think. i dont even care what my life is like as long as it doesnt fluxuate as it does. im beginning to think i mite need anti-depressants or something, but my parents would never let me get them because they would just say its my fault and to get over it. fuck them.

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[11 Sep 2004|11:01pm]
i woke up with a headache. lame. i feel better though, still discontented with the world, but at least not depressed. oh and another thing. i lost 20$ between last nite and 6 today. i dunno what hapend to it but that really fucking sucks.
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life sucks [11 Sep 2004|12:48am]
[ mood | depressed ]

i havent been this depressed since april 13 2003. im in a really shitty mood and i kinda know why but that doesnt explain why i feel this bad. maybe it was something someone said. i dunno.
when your stuck in an alternate world away from everything for weeks its easy to want everything to be the way you left it, but its also unrealistic. things move, and people move on without you. sure people missed me along the way, i dont argue that, but people get on with their own lives and during the course of absense people inevitably have to continue their lives even though yours ceases. unfortunately, your pain is yours alone and its not their fault that things move on, as that is the way it is. still, that doesnt make it any easier to accept or begin to accept the new state of affairs. i only hope that noone else has to suffer as i did, furthermore, noone should have to sacrifice what i have for no other reason than the world has shat on me.
its like jesus christ came down and took a shit right on me and he had god condemn it.
i think i killed myself on the inside tonite, or maybe ii just died all by itself

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NO!!! [06 Sep 2004|10:38pm]
[ mood | exhausted ]

I can't believe school starts tomorrow :(. its not fair. My summer got stolen, and i miss it. I get to see some of my friends this week, but probably not really because my parents wanna like talk to my friends parents and im not really comfortable with that. leave a message because i feel like it.
im ready to go see sara :) i miss her a lot

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fuck. just fuck [02 Sep 2004|02:39am]
[ mood | drained ]

i hate idaho. i really fucking hate it. 34 fucking days. well anyway im back, and im still grounded like forever. what is this bullshit. why does god hate me. my parents disabled my car or maybe it just died on its own, but i doubt that. unregardless, i miss my friends, sara and sean most of all, and i cant even see sara for god knows how long. i hate this.

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damnit [30 Jul 2004|02:16am]
[ mood | i have no fucking idea ]

leave a message.

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ok this is the last one... [30 Jul 2004|01:13am]
Dream Death by robert
Livejournal Name:
Favorite Apple:
Who will kill you?suckerforakissx
With:4 friends
At:4 in the morning
Made with Robert's memeGen

alright im done with these quiz dealys for a while i hope. My next entry will actually mean something lol.
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CJ Made a Dealy :) [29 Jul 2004|11:58pm]
CowPokeness by hoomoo
You will become a Cowpoke at age37
Number of Cattle29590
Lifes SayingIts all good
Made with Robert's memeGen
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Fabulous! [25 Jul 2004|01:46am]
[ mood | artistic ]

Party Monster by Robert
Favorite Music:
Favorite Drug:
Skrink or Skrod?:
You are:Angel
You are really a:Skrinklada
What you did to be fabulous:You were Michael Alig's Lover
You are a:Drug Dealer
Celebutante or Club Kid:Celebutante
You influenced:The Party Scene
Made with Robert's memeGen
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The Zodiac Killer [23 Jul 2004|11:29pm]
Death 2 by Robert
Method of Death:Murder
Serial Killer Copycat:The Zodiac
# of Wounds:7
Day that you die:June 11 2015
Famous Last Words:Death? That was so yesterday
Made with Robert's memeGen
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Pulp Fiction, Bitches! [23 Jul 2004|09:15am]
Pulp Fiction by Robert
Favorite Ice Cream:
You are:Jules
Your new life is as a:Reverend
Day you will die:June 14 2016
Made with Robert's memeGen
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updating [14 Jul 2004|10:25pm]
[ mood | bored ]

hmm so lets see. update on things since may. well, brandon bled on my car, i burned a couple holes in the seat covers on my car. i went to chain reaction a few weeks ago and saw rocket summer, and they were so bad we (me and sean) had to leave early and go to norms. at norms we met this waitress erin who always hooked us up with free everything. we went to a bn'o show 2 weeks ago i think at chain and there we met sara and sarah and dustin and whitney. they are a pretty cool bunch of kids and we've hung out a few times since then, and that sara girl is pretty cute :). my friends car got stolen and thrashed and towed and then the cops called and he got it back, with the center console missing, all his cds gone, the fuel line cut, and a lot of wires cut in the front. i drove him around to get parts and such and that was yesterday i think. today was pretty boring i didnt get out of the house until 2 hours ago to go over to brandons house for like 20 minutes. thats about it i think.

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hmm [14 Jul 2004|10:15pm]
Hooligan Bear
Hooligan Bear%D%A

Which Dysfunctional Care Bear Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla%D%A
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hey [14 Jul 2004|10:08pm]
i havent really updated much because i dunno.
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yo [14 Jun 2004|08:35am]
[ mood | bored ]

I swear to god someone better post a comment on this entry or i will kill..... maybe more than once ;)%D%Aseriously though, its been boring, but very nice outta school. i sleep a lot because thats what i do. when does summer school start? talk to me .....

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car [23 May 2004|03:55pm]
[ mood | happy ]

YAY! i got my liscence on thursday. which was a couple days ago but whateva. i finally got it, which means i got my car :). so ive been busy with that. and today i got seat covers and lights and shit, and next week ill get lights for under the car, and week after that i get my sub. its gonna be sweet.

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